1. Breathe hot breath on her left nipple to make it soft.
2. Measure vertical and horizontal nipple diameter.
* In inches, which is more accurate and more American.
3. Do her right, and calculate her total nipple average.
4. Multiply her average nipple diameter by 3.14159265.
5. If her nipple circumference = 3.6222563, keep her.
6. Otherwise her nipples are fatally flawed. Dump her.
** Post photos of flawed nipples: uglygirlfriends.com
What Circumference Should My Girlfriend’s Nipples Be If I want Her To Be Perfect?
